


The Best Laid Plans

by KyluxFicHell



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 03:29:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18065738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KyluxFicHell/pseuds/KyluxFicHell
Summary: “How many bass players have we been through, Fred?” Brian asks with a tired sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose.“Oh I don’t know, darling.” Freddie waves a hand at him dismissively. “I stopped keeping count after the third.”Brian rolls his eyes. “My point is, we’ve finally found a bass player who’s perfect. One who we all get on with. And you just had to go and fuck him, didn’t you Fred? You couldn’t keep your hands to yourself. He’s been with us less than four months and you’ve already got him pregnant.”ORJohn has a pregnancy scare at nineteen, followed by a miscarriage. Ten years later he and Freddie are ready to try again for a baby, but conceiving a child doesn’t seem to be as easy as it was the first time...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a mpreg fic and as per the tags please be warned that there will be mentions of a miscarriage. Freddie and John will struggle a bit with conceiving in the beginning, but the majority of the fic will follow John’s pregnancy and will be pretty fluffy! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy it and as always would love to hear what you think!

John has a pregnancy scare when he’s nineteen years old.

He tries not to vomit as he holds the little white stick in his trembling hand, and tries to convince himself that the small pink cross is some kind of mistake. He _can’t_ be pregnant. He and Freddie are always so careful when it comes to sex; they always use a condom, and John is diligent about taking his birth control pills-

_Shit._

He thinks back to a couple of weeks ago when they’d been playing a gig at a local uni, and he’d had way too much to drink. He’d thrown up in the toilets, and had basically passed out in the back of the van. He’d had sex with Freddie the next morning.

John takes another three tests just to be sure, but each time the result is the same.

John is pregnant.

He throws the sticks at the bathroom wall with a frustrated cry and runs his hands through his hair, heart racing. 

This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t have a baby now. He’d only joined Queen a few months ago, and it was the first time in his life he really felt as though he fitted in anywhere. He knows how many bassists the band has been through, and he knows how replaceable he is. There’s no way the boys would want him in the band with a screaming baby on his hip.

So many questions are running through his mind. How would Freddie react? How would his mother react? How would Freddie’s parents react? Where would the baby sleep? Who would look after it when they were playing gigs?

As it turns out, Freddie is a lot calmer about the whole thing than John is.

“My dear,” Freddie says softly as he pulls John into a hug and strokes his hair. “It’s going to be alright. We’ll figure it out together.”

“How, Freddie?” John sniffs miserably, trying to hold back tears. “How is this going to be okay? What are we going to do about Queen?”

“We’ll figure it out,” Freddie repeats, squeezing John tighter. “I’ll be with you for the whole thing. You won’t be alone.”

******

Brian and Roger are a little less calm.

“How many bass players have we been through, Fred?” Brian asks with a tired sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“Oh I don’t know, darling.” Freddie waves a hand at him dismissively. “I stopped keeping count after the third.”

Brian rolls his eyes. “My point is, we’ve finally found a bass player who’s perfect. One who we all get on with. And you just had to go and fuck him, didn’t you Fred? You couldn’t keep your hands to yourself. He’s been with us less than four months and you’ve already got him pregnant.”

John sits there silently while Freddie and Brian argue, one hand over his flat stomach.

“So what are we going to do?” Roger asks, trying to break the tension between the older men. “We’ll have to stop playing when Deacy starts getting big- possibly sooner; I think we should take medical advice on whether John should be playing bass at all while pregnant. And he’ll need some time to recover after the baby’s born and to figure out childcare, so we’re talking maybe a year’s hiatus-“

“Wait a minute,” John interrupts, confused. “Aren’t you just going to replace me?”

The other three men give him a dumbfounded look, as if he’s just suggested that they dissolve the band altogether and go back to their day jobs.

“Of course not, Deacy,” Roger says softly. “You’re the best bassist we’ve ever had. We’re not losing you.”

John feels such affection for his bandmates in that moment that he starts to cry. He can just blame it on the hormones, he thinks.

“It’s alright, John,” Freddie says softly, kissing his hair. “We’re a family, and we’ll work through this together.”

“I still can’t believe you got our bassist pregnant,” Brian mutters.

******

In the end they don’t have to worry about Queen at all.

John wakes up a week later with blood on the sheets and a sharp pain in his stomach, and he ends up spending the night in hospital. The doctor confirms he’s miscarried, and assures him that it’s very common at this stage of the pregnancy.

Freddie comes to the hospital the next morning and holds John while he cries. Brian and Roger later turn up and present him with a bouquet of flowers.

John doesn’t understandwhy he feels so sad about losing something he didn’t even want in the first place.

*****

It isn’t until ten years later that John seriously thinks about what it might be like to have a child.

He’s lying in bed with Freddie one night when his husband rolls over to face him, warm brown eyes shining and a sleepy smile on his face. “We should have a baby.”

“Mm?” John is too tired to give a proper reply.

“Yeah,” Freddie says, sounding a little more awake. “It’s the perfect time. We’ve finished the album now, so we can afford to take a bit of a break.”

John shifts closer to his husband in response to the seriousness of his tone. “You’ve been thinking about this for a while, haven’t you?”

Freddie grins and kisses John gently. “Yes I have, my dear. I’ve been thinking about it since we got married actually. We’ve just always had so much going on since then, you know, too many projects to focus on. But now we’ve finished the album and I think Bri and Rog are keen to take a break before we launch into the next one. So we have time to focus on starting a family. That is, if you still want children?” Freddie cuts off, looking a little hesitant.

John lifts a hand to stroke the older man’s face. His chest fills with warmth as he imagines a little Freddie running around, with a toothy grin and warm eyes. Freddie is right; this is a good time to have a baby. They’re the right age, they have a house, the latest Queen album has just been completed, and they’re financially secure. They’re _ready_. Their circumstances are very different to ten years ago.

“Yes,” John says gently. “I want a family. I want a family with you.” He tangles their legs together. “I think you’re right. This is as good a time as any for us to do it.”

Freddie’s smile widens. “Yeah?” The excitement is evident in his voice. “So…what? We’re trying for a baby?”

“We’re trying for a baby,” John confirms, feeling a smile creep onto his own face.

As Freddie leans in to give the younger man a kiss, John feels his heart flutter with anticipation and excitement. Excitement for Freddie, because he’s going to be a wonderful father. And excitement for himself, because the idea of having a baby with Freddie is something he’d been fantasising about for the last ten years.

*****

Trying for a baby turns out to be more work than John first thought.

At first, they just go for it the old fashioned way; John comes off his contraceptive pills and Freddie doesn’t wear a condom. John honestly thinks that should be enough to do the trick. One night of sex and, bam, he should be pregnant. 

When Freddie enters him, the sensation is incredible. They’d never had sex without a condom before, and although it is slightly odd not to feel that rubber barrier inside him, John feels closer to his husband than ever. When Freddie moans and orgasms, the feeling of cum trickling out of John’s backside is a little uncomfortable, but then he remembers that tonight Freddie’s cum is serving a purpose; it isn’t just a sticky nuisance.

So John is a bit surprised when he takes a pregnancy test a few days later and it comes back negative.

“Don’t worry, darling,” Freddie says when John tells him, pulling his husband into a hug. “Sometimes it takes a while. I’ve read that it can take a few weeks or even months.”

Freddie starts doodling charts. And doing calculations. He works out what time of the month John is at his most fertile, what foods are best to eat to guarantee conception. He does hours of research on what they could do to increase their chances of getting pregnant.

They try.

And they try.

And they try.

They have sex as frequently as they can, in every position they can think of. And yet every time John looks at that little white stick, he’s haunted by the single red line that never seems to change.

Freddie is getting better at hiding his disappointment. Each time John comes to him with the news, he holds the younger man a little tighter, kisses him a little harder, reassures him a little more.

John doesn’t understand. When he was nineteen, he got pregnant without even trying. But now that he actually _wants_ a baby, his body doesn’t seem to be interested.

“It’s my fault,” John sniffs into Freddie’s shoulder. “It’s got to be me, Fred. What if…what if that miscarriage I had ten years ago was a sign that there’s something wrong with me? That I’m not meant to have a baby?”

“Hey,” Freddie says softly, cupping John’s cheeks and brushing his thumbs over the younger man’s cheekbones to wipe away his tears. “This is not your fault, understand?” He places a gentle kiss to his husband’s trembling lips. “We’ll just keep trying, okay? It takes a while sometimes, my love. It’ll happen.”

“Yeah,” John says, his voice thick. “Yeah, it’ll happen for us.”

******

Six months later, John is starting to feel more miserable and a tiny bit hopeless.

“Do you feel like trying tonight?” Freddie asks as they’re driving to Brian and Roger’s for dinner.

John shrugs and shifts in the passenger seat. “I’m a little tired tonight.”

John can’t believe they’ve finally reached that point in their marriage where sex is starting to feel like a chore. He never thought he’d feel like that with Freddie, but it feels as though all the passion and energy from their early years together has dissolved. Sex has become so mechanical now that there’s a motive behind it other than pleasure, and the more they fail (the more _John_ fails), the more sad it becomes.

Seeing Brian and Roger cheers John up a bit; now that they’re taking a bit of a break from Queen the four of them don’t see each other as often. Being with his friends always helps him to take his mind off whatever’s going on with him and Freddie, and he’s grateful for the distraction tonight. Brian and Roger don’t know that Freddie and John are trying for a baby, so it will be nice to be able to keep his mind off that tonight.

“You look nice,” Roger says gently when he kisses John’s cheek, stroking one hand through the younger man’s hair. “Are you growing your hair out again? It’s starting to look rather fluffy.”

John gives a bashful smile. “Yeah. Thought it was time for a change. You look nice too, Rog.”

Roger seems to be in a rather good mood throughout the evening. He certainly distracts John from his thoughts with the tale of how the engine of his latest car had nearly exploded, and by the time they sit down for dinner John is laughing more than he has at any point in the last six months.

It’s only when Brian pours a glass of wine for everyone except Roger that John starts to feel his hands go clammy.

“Finally giving up the drink, Rog?” Freddie laughs, but John can tell that he already knows what’s about to happen.

“Do you want to tell them?” Roger asks his husband with a warm smile.

Brian beams at them all. “Rog is expecting.”

John feels like he wants the floor to open up and swallow him while.

“How wonderful,” Freddie says happily. “A new addition to our Queen family! Congratulations to you both.”

Roger grins and places a hand on his flat stomach. “Thanks. It’s still early days- I’m only seven weeks along, but we couldn’t wait to tell you both.”

“Well we’re so pleased for you,” Freddie says warmly. “Aren’t we, John?”

John nods, trying to force down the jealousy that’s clawing its way up through his chest.

“I’m so happy for you both,” John says, his voice a little thick with emotion. “You’re going to be wonderful parents.”

They spend the rest of the evening talking about the baby, and John wants to just _die_. It breaks his heart to discover that it took Brian and Roger less than two months of trying to conceive, which only serves to make him feel like more of a failure. He smiles and asks thoughtful questions like any best friend would, but the more he hears about Roger’s morning sickness and their plans for their first scan, the more he just wants to curl up in a ball and cry.

John is relieved when it’s time for them to leave, and he feels a little guilty when Brian pulls him into a hug and kisses the top of his head.

“Are you alright?” Brian asks softly. “You seem a little quieter than usual this evening.”

“I’m fine,” John lies with a tired smile. “I was ill last week and still haven’t quite recovered I don’t think.” He pushes himself onto his toes to kiss Brian’s cheek. “Congratulations, Bri. I’m so happy for you.”

The drive home is quiet, and John can sense the tension in the air.

“You’re upset,” Freddie says softly, eyes on the road.

“Yes,” John replies sadly. “I’m a terrible friend.”

“You’re a wonderful friend. You just spent the whole evening pretending you were overjoyed when I know it must have been killing you inside. So did I.”

John bites his lip. “I really am happy for them. It just reminded me of how much I want a baby and how far away that goal seems for us right now.”

Freddie takes his hand off the gear stick to take hold of John’s hand and bring it to his lips.

“It will happen for us, my love,” Freddie says gently. “I know it will.”

John smiles weakly, but for the first time in his life his husband’s words do little to comfort him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to everyone who’s read and commented so far! You can find me on tumblr @bohemian-rhapsody-slash

After another month of fruitless trying, John is starting to feel completely dejected.

He casually brings up the idea of them both getting fertility tests, but Freddie immediately rejects it. The older man scoffs at the idea, as if the very act of simply asking him to take a test is insulting. He insists that there’s nothing wrong with either of them, and it will happen for them soon.

John doesn’t feel as though he can talk to Freddie properly about this anymore. As much as he hates to say it, his husband is blinded by determination. It’s one of the things John loves most about Freddie; it’s one of the things that made John fall in love with him in the first place, but right now it’s not doing them any good. On this occasion they need to _talk_ about things rather than just steamrolling ahead as if everything is fine.

John gets so desperate to speak to someone about it that he ends up letting it all out in front of Roger.

They’re sitting in a dingy hospital waiting room waiting for Roger’s appointment for his twelve week scan. Brian has had to go and visit his mother unexpectedly, who’s fallen ill, so Roger had asked John if the younger man would accompany him to the appointment instead. John agreed of course, but he feels terrible for thinking he’d rather not be here, because he’s not sure how he’ll react to seeing Roger’s baby come to life on the ultrasound screen. The whole thing is just another painful reminder of what he can’t have.

“Cheer up, Deaks,” Roger grins, flicking through an old hospital magazine. “Whatever it is it can’t be that bad.”

John gives Roger a weak smile.

“Or maybe it can be.” Roger puts down his magazine, concerned. “What’s the matter?”

John bites his lip. “It’s fine. It’s nothing.”

He glances round the waiting room. They’re at a private hospital so it’s fairly quiet, and the hum of hospital activity outside means that their conversation won’t be overheard, but he’s still not sure how Freddie would feel about him talking about this to anyone else, even to one of their closest friends. But John needs to tell _someone_.

Roger takes John’s hand in his own, his blue eyes soft. “I know you better than that. Please tell me what’s wrong.”

John sighs. “Freddie and I are trying for a baby.”

He feels as though a weight has been lifted from his shoulders as soon as he says it.

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Roger grins, but his smile soon fades when he notices the miserable look on John’s face. “Oh. Are you...are you having problems?”

John nods sadly, staring at his lap.

“How long have you been trying?” Roger asks gently.

“About ten months.”

John feels like such a failure as he says it out loud.

“Well that’s not too long,” Roger says reassuringly. He lowers his voice. “How many times a week?”

“Two or three.”

Roger nods thoughtfully. “Well, you know it took me and Brian about six months to conceive.”

John raises an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Yeah. Longest six months of my life. I thought it would never happen.”

John isn’t sure why he’d been under the impression that Brian and Roger had been able to conceive instantly. He’d always thought of Roger as being particularly fertile for some reason.

“I don’t think you should be worried just yet.” Roger pats John’s knee. “You know what worked for us though? We _stopped_ trying.”

John frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we were becoming so obsessed with conceiving that sex wasn’t really enjoyable anymore. It was stressing us out and making us really tense, which didn’t help. We were arguing all the time. So we decided to just stop trying and stop thinking about making a baby. We decided to just enjoy ourselves and have fun, and it eventually just happened for us.”

John looks at his friend thoughtfully. “So you think we should just...forget about having a baby? And just focus on, um, having good sex?”

Roger grins. “Exactly. Do what makes you feel good. Go to a hotel, or do some roleplay, or wear some sexy lingerie for Freddie-“

“ _Rog_!” John feels his face flush as he glances towards the nurses’ desk.

“Just have some fun, Deacy. The rest of it will happen naturally.”

John reflects on Roger’s words throughout the appointment, and as he looks at the fuzzy image of Roger’s baby while his friend squeezes his hand, he wonders if maybe Rog is onto something.

*****

A few weeks later, John works out the day on which he is meant to be at his most fertile, and begins making his preparations.

He cleans their bedroom from top to bottom. He takes a long shower, scrubbing every inch of his skin. He makes sure they have some spare sheets ready for later.

John thinks back to Roger’s advice- _wear_ _some_ _sexy_ _lingerie_ _for_ _Freddie_ \- and hunts round in the back of his underwear drawer for the lacy knickers and stockings which he hasn’t worn since just after they got married. He’s pretty sure he still has some high heels in a wardrobe somewhere.

John tries to forget about everything they’ve been through over the last few months. Tonight is just about the two of them and reigniting the intimacy they once shared.

When Freddie arrives home that evening, John is ready and waiting for him in the living room.

Freddie freezes when he sees John sitting on the sofa, and his eyes drink in the sight of the younger man wearing nothing but a pair of lacy black knickers, stockings held up by a garter belt, and a pair of high heels. 

“Fuck.” Freddie’s eyes widen as his gaze roams over John’s body. “This is… _fuck_.”

John smiles and walks over to his husband, trying to keep his balance as it’s been a while since he’s walked in heels. He wraps his arms around the older man’s neck and leans in to give him a deep kiss. He feels Freddie’s hands settle on his hips, thumbing at the lacy material as John presses his body up against his husband. 

“Not that I’m complaining,” Freddie murmurs appreciatively, large hands cupping the curve of John’s rear, “but what’s all this about?”

“We’re going to have a lot of sex tonight,” John whispers, kissing along Freddie’s jaw. “In every position possible. I hope you’re up to the challenge, Fred?”

Freddie grins. “My darling, that is no challenge at all.”

Freddie takes John’s hand and eagerly leads him to the bedroom, allowing the younger man to lean on him when he struggles in his heels a bit. When they get there, Freddie wastes no time in pulling off his t-shirt, while John unbuckles his belt and pulls down his jeans and underwear. Giving a quick lick to Freddie’s cock, John stands and pushes the older man onto the bed.

“Let’s just have fun tonight,” John says huskily, kissing up Freddie’s chest. “Let’s forget about trying to make a baby; let’s just enjoy ourselves.”

Freddie smiles at him warmly and cups his face, before leaning in for another kiss.

They spend more time on foreplay than they have in _ages_. Freddie hastily manages to get John’s knickers off, kissing down the younger man’s thighs as he peels off the lacy underwear. John moans as Freddie takes his cock into his mouth, sucking slowly, before licking down to John’s entrance. He loses track of how long Freddie spends with his head between his legs, but it’s not long before John is ready for more.

The first position they try is John riding Freddie. John takes hold of his husband’s cock and positions himself over it, sliding down slowly, focussing completely on the feeling of Freddie filling him.

“Fuck, Freddie,” John sighs. “Been thinking about your cock all day.”

“ _Shit_ ,” Freddie moans, grabbing the younger man’s hips. “So tight, my love.”

They stay like that for some time, with John slowly bouncing up and down in Freddie’s lap while they kiss. For a while, John really does forget that they’re trying to make a baby, especially when Freddie reaches out to stroke his cock. He decides to just lose himself in the moment, and enjoy being intimate with his husband.

They stay still for a few minutes after they come, holding each other and kissing. When they’ve recovered, Freddie rolls them over so that John is on his hands and knees and the older man is pressed up against him from behind. John lets out a silent scream as Freddie presses into him, their hips slapping together as he begins thrusting.

“Jesus Christ, Freddie, fuck!” John has always loved this position; it allows Freddie to hit his sweet spot at an angle that really makes his toes curl.

“You like that, baby?” Freddie pants. “Is that good?”

“ _Yes_. Oh my God, Freddie. Don’t stop.”

Freddie doesn’t last long this time, and as soon as he orgasms he reaches round to pump John’s cock. John sees stars and collapses forward as his husband pulls out of him.

“I hate to say it, but I’m not as young as I used to be,” Freddie says breathlessly. “I don’t think I can keep this up much longer.”

“One more time,” John pleads, sounding just as breathless. “Let’s switch positions one more time.”

They kiss for a while to give themselves time to recover once again, and Freddie caresses John’s cheek with a tenderness that reminds him of when they first started sleeping together. For a moment, John feels as though it’s ten years ago and he’s falling in love with Freddie all over again.

Pushing Freddie down on the bed, John leans down and takes his husband’s soft cock into his mouth. It tastes of dried cum and his own arse, but John doesn’t care. All he cares about is getting Freddie hard again.

When Freddie has once again gained a sizeable erection, they switch positions so that John is lying on his back with Freddie between his legs. John is starting to feel a bit sore, but he can’t help but let out a moan as Freddie’s cock pushes inside him again. Wrapping his thighs around his husband’s waist, John pulls Freddie down to kiss him, trying to convey everything he feels- he loves Freddie, he appreciates him, they’re going to have a baby, _they’re_ _going_ _to_ _have_ _a_ _baby_ …

When Freddie comes inside him one final time, John has a really good feeling. He can’t explain it, but he really feels that this is their night. As soon his husband pulls out and collapses beside him, John shifts into a more comfortable position and lifts his legs into the air, holding his thighs for support.

“What on earth are you doing?” Freddie chuckles in a hoarse voice.

“Trying to keep your cum inside me,” John replies, sticking his tongue out in concentration. “All the books say this is what you should do after sex.”

Freddie laughs and peppers kisses over the younger man’s face.

John has a _really_ good feeling.

*****

The next time he takes a pregnancy test, John stares at it very hard for several minutes.

He’s afraid that if he blinks, that if he looks away for even a second, then the result might somehow change. The last time John had seen that little pink cross, he’d been overcome by fear and anxiety. Now a very different set of emotions is running through him.

Feeling the joy bubbling in his chest, John can’t help but smile at himself in the bathroom mirror.

He’s going to have a baby. He’s going to have a baby with _Freddie_. They’d created something together, something that is a little bit of both of them; something that is better than any Queen composition or anything else they’d ever done.

Wasting no more time, John makes his way swiftly downstairs to the piano, where Freddie is sat playing chords and scribbling on sheets of paper.

“Christ, you scared me!” Freddie laughs as John quietly takes a seat on the piano stool next to him. “Everything alright?”

John wraps his arms around Freddie’s neck, leaning in for a kiss. It’s sweet and tender and filled with the happiness that’s building to a crescendo inside him.

“I’m pregnant,” John whispers against Freddie’s lips as they part.

Their eyes meet as Freddie takes a moment to digest what he’s just been told.

“Really?” he says, sounding a little uncertain.

“Really,” John replies, fishing the pregnancy test from the back pocket of his jeans and pressing it into Freddie’s hand. “You’re going to be a father, Freddie.”

Freddie stares at the little white stick in his hand, examining it just as closely as John had. When he looks up, he has the most blinding smile on his face that John has ever seen.

“Oh, John,” Freddie breathes, leaning in for another kiss. “I… _fuck_. Oh my God. We’re going to be parents!”

John laughs and runs his fingers through his husband’s hair. He thinks back to the last time he told Freddie he was pregnant, and how the older man had looked far more solemn than he does now. Now the happiness is evident on his face, all the way from his wide smile to the sparkle in his eyes.

“We’re going to be parents,” Freddie repeats, quieter this time, as if to himself. He runs his hands over John’s flat stomach. “I love you, John. I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” John replies gently, giving his husband another kiss.

He’s never felt so happy in his entire life. Not when he first met Freddie, not when he joined Queen, not when they had their first kiss, not even on their wedding day…

Without warning, Freddie stands, lifting a giggling John and placing him on his feet.

“We need to celebrate,” Freddie says breathlessly. “Here." He lifts John onto the top of the piano before reaching for his belt.

"You want to have _more_ sex?” John laughs. “It seems like all we’ve been doing lately is having sex. I’m already pregnant, Fred, you can relax.”

“Mm, never get tired of having sex with you.” Freddie presses his cheek against John’s, and John feels such an overwhelming rush of love and affection for his husband that he wants to cry. 

It’s been a long and painful journey to get to this point, and John knows that they’re not quite out of the woods yet, but confirmation that this is possible for them is enough for now.

They’re one step closer to having the family they’ve always wanted.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the love and patience! As always, would love to hear what you think :)
> 
> Come and say hi on tumblr @bohemian-rhapsody-slash

For the first few months of his pregnancy, John is on edge. 

They agree not to tell anyone until after his first check up, just in case. Just in case it happens again. 

John desperately tries not to think about the very real possibility that he could miscarry again, and instead tries to focus on thinking about all the stuff they’re going to need to buy for the baby. He tries to think about clothes and car seats and bibs and nappies. Freddie even buys a book of baby names, which John resists flicking through for the time being, because he knows once he starts getting attached to a name, he’ll start forming an even bigger attachment to the embryo inside him.

When the time for the first check up rolls around after three months, John is absolutely terrified. He can tell that Freddie is nervous too as they sit in the waiting room at the doctor’s office, but the older man smiles and chats away, obviously trying to keep John’s mind off the impending medical exam.

John shifts in his seat and holds Freddie’s hand. He hates visiting the doctor anyway; anything that requires him to remove clothing in front of anyone but Freddie generally makes him feel very uncomfortable. Today’s exam is twice as bad because he’s so worried about the baby.

“It’ll be fine,” Freddie says to him gently as they’re called into the office, placing a reassuring hand on the small of John’s back.

Once inside, Freddie helps John remove his clothes and put on the ridiculous open-back hospital gown, before helping him up onto the examination table. John feels cold and vulnerable, and he wants to go home. 

“Hello, John,” the doctor says as he enters the room. He’s an older man who looks to be in his late fifties, and he’s examining a chart in his hands. “My name is Dr. Mortimer, and I’ll be looking after you for the duration of your pregnancy. How are you feeling today?”

“Good, thanks,” John says, fiddling with the corner of his gown and giving a nervous smile.

“I know it’s early at the moment, but any pains, aches, spotting?”

“No,” Freddie cuts in. “Everything’s been normal so far.”

Dr. Mortimer looks up to peer at Freddie over the top of his glasses. “You must be the father, I presume?”

“Yeah,” Freddie replies with a nervous smile. “I’m his husband, Freddie.”

“Freddie Mercury,” Dr Mortimer smiles with a knowing nod. “Well, Freddie, I can tell that you’re a tad nervous. But don’t worry, both John and your child will be in good hands with me. Right, shall we get cracking then? John, lie down for me and put your feet in the stirrups, please.”

Swallowing, John obeys, trying to ignore how exposed he feels. Freddie smiles at him and holds his hand, which makes him feel a little better as the doctor pulls on a pair of latex gloves and stands between his open legs.

“Alright, John, I’m just going to have a little feel around inside you to check everything’s as it should be. It might be a bit uncomfortable, but it shouldn’t hurt.”

John hears the sound of a bottle cap being popped open, before he feels the doctor’s finger push gently inside him. He breathes in sharply at the intrusion and shivers a little in response to the cold lube. It’s a stark contrast to when Freddie’s fingers enter him; his husband always makes sure to warm the lube first, and John is always slightly buzzed on arousal. Here though, he’s very uncomfortable.

“You’re doing great,” Freddie whispers, clearly sensing his discomfort, and squeezing his hand tighter. 

Dr. Mortimer moves his finger about a bit inside John, before removing it. “Well done, John. You’ll be pleased to know everything seems fine. Before we do the ultrasound, I’ll just feel around your midsection to check everything’s okay there.”

After putting on a fresh pair of gloves, the doctor places his hands on the gentle curve of John’s stomach. He feels around John’s entire abdomen, nodding and smiling. Although everything seems to be going well so far, John is still nervous. He won’t be completely happy until they’ve done the ultrasound and he can see that his baby is healthy.

“I had a miscarriage,” John blurts out suddenly. Dr. Mortimer looks up at him, and Freddie squeezes his hand. “About ten years ago. I, um, had a miscarriage. Freddie was the father then too. I’m…worried. I’m worried it might happen again.”

“How far along where you when you miscarried?” the doctor asks.

“He was only a few weeks along,” Freddie replies, cutting in again. He squeezes John’s hand harder.

“This is quite common,” Dr. Mortimer says with a kind smile. “Miscarriages happen more often than you think, and in most cases, they happen within the first three months. They can occur for a number of reasons, and quite often it’s nothing to do with the parents. It’s just nature’s way of saying it’s not meant to be. Let’s do a scan, and we can have a look and see if your baby’s healthy.”

Feeling slightly more reassured, John removes his feet from the stirrups and lifts up his gown as the doctor places a sheet over his lower body.

Dr. Mortimer tries to distract them with small talk as he boots up the machine, asking about whether they have any plans for another album, and laughing when they tell him they’ll probably need to take a break for a while.

“This baby’s going to have music in its blood!” The doctor gives them a wink, before picking up the probe and pressing it against John’s stomach.

It takes quite a few minutes to build up the scan, during which Dr. Mortimer asks more questions about their personal lives, and Freddie politely responds. It’s just like being in a press interview, and John is grateful that his husband does all the talking so he can just take a minute to compose himself.

When the image is finally ready, John can barely breathe. The doctor’s eyes quickly scan over the screen, before giving a smile and a nod. 

“Everything looks good. Your baby won’t be much to look at right now; it’s very small. But I can tell you that everything looks as it should.”

John feels relief flood through him as he stares at the small blob on the screen. His baby is okay.  _His_ _baby_ _is_ _okay_ …

The image is fuzzy and it’s not much to look at really, but John finds himself tearing up. The tiny blob on the screen will one day be his walking, talking, breathing child. His dream of being a parent is so close to coming true.

“It looks just like you,” Freddie whispers jokingly in John’s ear, before pressing a kiss to his hand just below his wedding ring.

“Mm.” John can’t give a proper reply. 

 _His_ _baby_ _is_ _okay_.

*****

Reassured that the baby is healthy for the time being, John is able to start focusing on making sure that  _he_  stays as healthy as possible.

The thing that annoys him the most is not being able to smoke. On days when his hormones are acting up, there’s nothing that he craves more than a good cigarette, and he ends up feeling restless and on edge. He can’t even have a cup of coffee. 

Freddie also gives up drinking coffee and alcohol and smoking to support his husband, but it doesn’t really make John feel any better. The only thing that does improve John’s mood is when Freddie sidles up next to him on the sofa, and leans down to place a gentle kiss against his stomach before humming some ridiculous tune, insisting that the baby can hear him. John laughs and runs his hands through Freddie’s hair as the older man rests his head against John’s stomach and babbles to their child.

Despite the fact that John spends most of his mornings throwing up, he finds himself really embracing pregnancy. He starts reading pregnancy books and taking vitamins. He lets Freddie buy him some bigger clothes for when he starts gaining more weight. 

They wait a few more weeks before telling anyone, because despite the doctor’s reassurances, John is still paranoid that something terrible will happen to his baby. He still thinks that sharing his excitement with others would be tempting fate. And if something awful does happen, he would rather deal with it without anyone else giving him pitiful stares.

Eventually Freddie persuades him that they should tell Brian and Roger when their friends are over for dinner one night. It’s getting to the point where John is starting to show, and although he can just about get away with blaming it on normal weight gain, he knows soon it will be obvious that he’s pregnant. He also knows that Roger will be suspicious anyway, given the conversation they’d had a few months ago about Freddie and John trying for a baby. 

When Brian and Roger turn up, John can’t help but think Roger looks twice as big as when they last saw him.

“You look bloody huge,” Freddie comments when he sees Roger cupping the curve of his bump.

“Thanks, Fred,” Roger replies with a roll of his eyes as Brian helps him with his coat.

“Oh hush, darling, you know I think you look divine. You’re positively glowing.”

Roger gives John a suspicious look when they exchange kisses, his eyes scanning the younger man from head to toe. “Everything alright? You look a little tense.”

“I’m fine.” John smiles, trying not to betray his nervousness.

He can tell that Roger doesn’t believe him though, and he wonders if perhaps his friend has worked out his secret already. Brian doesn’t seem to notice anything unusual when he gives John a hug and a kiss on the cheek, but Roger’s eyes linger worriedly on him.

Dinner is a comfortable affair, and they laugh as they listen to Roger playfully complain about his aches and pains and the woes of pregnancy while lovingly rubbing his bump. Brian looks on fondly, and John doesn’t think he’s ever seen the two of them look so happy. Seeing Roger like this makes John excited for everything that he’ll get to experience in the next few months as his baby grows.

Despite Freddie constantly giving him signals (touching his thigh, questioning gazes, knocking their feet together), John can’t bring himself to make the announcement. He just keeps thinking about the last time he’d told them all he was pregnant, and how his friends had looked at him with sympathetic gazes, and then with pure pity after the miscarriage.

But he knows this isn’t like last time. This time is different.

He’s grateful for Freddie giving him his space and letting him decide when to tell everyone, because an opportune moment presents itself when they’re all drinking tea after dinner in the living room.

“You look a little different,” Roger comments, his eyes searching John’s face. “Something is different.”

John glances at Freddie before smiling, taking a deep breath. “Well, I’ve gained a little weight actually.”

“Oh?”

“Because I’m pregnant.”

“ _Oh_.” Roger claps his hands together in excitement. “I fucking knew it! I knew you were knocked up the minute I saw you, John, I just knew. Bloody hell! Congratulations, mate.”

“Thanks.” John can’t stop beaming at Roger’s enthusiasm as he’s pulled into a tight hug, and laughs when Roger sticks his tongue out at Freddie after being reprimanded for being too rough with John.

Brian offers his congratulations in the form of a kiss on the cheek and a gentle pat to John’s stomach. “You do look really well, John. And I’m sure you won’t bitch half as much as Rog does through your pregnancy.”

While Brian gives Freddie a hug and offers him congratulations, Roger grins and takes both of John’s hands in his own.

“This is _so_ exciting!” Roger is practically bouncing on the spot. “This means that Baby May and Baby Mercury will only be a few months apart. They can go to school together, be best friends, and _oh_ _my_ _god_ , maybe fall in love-“

John laughs. “Rog, I think we’re getting ahead of ourselves. It’s still fairly early days-“

“We could be in-laws, John! We could share _grandchildren_.”

“Yes,” John agrees with a warm smile. “That would be lovely. But for now let’s just focus on growing these human beings inside of us and giving birth, shall we?”

“Fine.” Roger rolls his eyes playfully. “So tell me how it happened? Did you take my advice and have some raunchy sex with your husband?”

“ _Rog_.” John blushes and glances at Freddie, who’s thankfully still chatting away to Brian. “Well, yes, I took your advice. We decided not to focus on making a baby and just concentrate on enjoying ourselves, and it seemed to do the trick.”

Roger winks. “Did you wear something lacy and dance around for Freddie?”

John chuckles. “That’s not far from what happened.”

“The sex gets even better the more pregnant you look. _Trust_ me. Freddie won’t be able to keep his hands off you.”

“Good to know.” John feels his cheeks flushing even more, but he can’t keep the smile from his face.

“And you get to put your feet up and order Fred around because you need your rest.”

“Yeah, you’ll have to watch out for that, Fred,” Brian chips in, rejoining the conversation. “I’m sure John won’t be as bad as Rog, though.”

“I am more than happy to do anything my beloved asks of me.” Freddie shuffles up next to John and gives him a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

They spend the rest of the evening talking about the babies, and it makes the whole thing seem so much more real. John can actually picture himself with a baby in his arms and holding hands with a toddler and teaching his kid how to ride a bike-

But again a part of him doesn’t want to dwell on it too much, because he knows there’s still time for things to go wrong. 

“Be careful of the media,” Brian advises as him and Roger are leaving later. “As soon as they get wind of this, they’ll want photos of John on page two of every tabloid.”

“I’ll keep them away from my John,” Freddie says firmly, and John shivers a little in response to the possessiveness in his husband’s voice.

When they’ve all exchanged kisses and hugs and their friends have left, Freddie presses himself up against John from behind.

“Let’s go to bed,” he says huskily, fingers slipping under John’s shirt to rub at his hips. “Hearing you talk about being pregnant with Rog did things to me.”

John turns his head for a kiss. “You randy thing.”

“I’m only going to get worse.”

As Freddie takes John’s hand to lead him upstairs, the younger man smiles to himself.

Maybe it’s time to worry less and enjoy this more.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re getting close to the end of this fluff fest now! As usual, thanks for your love and support. :)

They begin to receive a tidal wave of visitors once they announce the news to close friends and family.

John isn’t used to having company so frequently, and he certainly isn’t used to so many people wanting to feel his abdomen. His mother, his sister, Freddie’s mother, Freddie’s sister, Brian, Roger…all of them suddenly start placing their hands on his bump without warning, patting and rubbing and stroking. It’s soothing in a way, but having so many people touch him unexpectedly takes some adjusting to.

Ever since Roger found out that John is expecting, him and Brian seem to spend rather a lot of time at Freddie and John’s house. John starts to get used to weekly visits, which turn into bi-weekly visits, which then escalate into _tri_ -weekly visits by the time he reaches his fifth month. It’s not as if he doesn’t enjoy his friends’ company, because he does, but it’s rather exhausting entertaining them and answering question after question about the baby.

“Have you felt it kick yet?” Roger asks excitedly during one such visit, patting John’s small bump.

“No,” John replies, trying to hide the disappointment in his voice. “The doctor said I probably won’t feel anything until I’m six months along, so still a few weeks to go yet.” He begins stroking the bump himself, and it’s oddly relaxing to feel Roger stroking as well.

“Thought of any names yet?” Brian asks, looking at Freddie.

“We have a few in mind,” Freddie replies thoughtfully, “but we’re not going to find out the gender until the baby is born.”

“If it’s a boy,” Roger says, giving John’s bump another gentle pat, “you’re going to name him Roger, of course. Rogerina could be nice for a girl.”

“In your dreams,” John scoffs.

“In all seriousness though,” Roger laughs, resuming his stroking, “how is everything? Any problems so far?” He looks between Freddie and John. The concern in his eyes is evident even if it’s not in his voice; John knows they all have haunting memories of that night ten years ago when John lost his first baby.

“Everything’s great,” Freddie replies brightly, taking a seat on the other side of John and wrapping his arm around his husband. “All the checkups have gone well; the doctor says the baby’s perfectly healthy.”

“That’s good to hear,” Brian says softly with a smile. “I’m so happy for you guys. You’re gonna be great parents.”

“You guys are too,” John chips in, placing a hand on top of Roger’s large bump, smiling when he feels a gentle kick. “You must be getting excited now- not long to go.”

Roger smiles happily and picks up the bowl of popcorn he’d been munching on, balancing it on his bump. “Every morning I wake up convinced that today will be the day he’ll make an appearance. But he seems to be too comfy in there.”

“I’ve had the hospital bag packed for weeks,” Brian says. “Just in case. I can’t wait until the baby is born, but in a way I’ll be a bit sad too. Rog looks beautiful pregnant.”

“Shove off,” Roger laughs, but he’s blushing nonetheless, and John doesn’t miss the secret smile the two of them share briefly.

“I have to agree,” Freddie adds with a smile. “Our boys look rather lovely pregnant. Their arses are almost twice their usual size.”

John giggles and buries his face in Roger’s neck, who throws a piece of popcorn at Freddie.

“Maybe we’ll just have to have another baby when this one’s been born,” Brian says half playfully.

“Maybe we will,” Roger says, sounding a little less playful.

*****

Two weeks later, Freddie and John get a phone call in the middle of the night.

They drive to the hospital at two in the morning, despite Freddie insisting that John should stay home and rest, and they sit in a waiting room for four hours.

When Brian finally comes to get them, looking tired but elated, they’re led to a quiet room at the end of the ward. It’s there that they finally see Roger, propped up on about five pillows, looking weaker and paler than they’ve ever seen him before.

He’s smiling though, looking exhausted with his hair sticking up all over the place and his skin still glistening with sweat, and in his arms is a tiny little baby.

John feels his heart _swell_. 

“Meet James Timothy May,” Brian says proudly. 

“Oh, _Rog_.” John can’t help but immediately drift to Roger’s bedside. “He’s gorgeous.”

“I know,” Roger sighs happily. “I’m so in love with him already.”

“You look fucking awful, darling,” Freddie comments to Roger, earning a glare from John. “But it looks like it was worth it.”

The baby is gently passed round, and John doesn’t want to let him go when it’s his turn. James has dark tufts of hair and Roger’s big blue eyes and John’s heart just melts. It only reaffirms his own longing for a baby and his impatience to have his own family.

In the end they decide not to stay too long and to give the new parents some privacy so that Roger can rest.

John sighs happily as he hands back the baby though, thinking of how in just a few months’ time he’ll be able to hold his own baby in his arms.

*****

Over the next few weeks, John finds it increasingly difficult to move around and stand up. 

Which is why, when he feels the baby start to kick for the first time, he doesn’t even attempt to try to stand from the sofa to find his husband, and instead simply hollers, “FREDDIE!”

He hears a vague grunt in response coming from somewhere upstairs as he excitedly runs his hands over his abdomen, feeling little jabs here and there.

“FREDDIE! COME QUICKLY!”

Within seconds he hears the older man thundering down the stairs before he skids to a stop in front of John.

“What is it?” Freddie asks, panic evident in his voice. “Is everything alright? Is it you? Is it the baby?”

“Come here, idiot,” John says with a smile, reaching for Freddie’s hand. He places the other man’s hand on his bump, and watches as Freddie’s face lights up when he feels their child kick.

“Fuck.” Freddie collapses next to John, placing his other hand on John’s midsection as well. “That’s… _fuck_. That’s our baby.”

John feels himself beaming, so incredibly happy to feel that his child is healthy and _strong_.

“I can’t wait to meet you,” he says quietly to his belly, gently stroking with Freddie. “Your papa can’t wait to meet you too.”

Freddie is being very quiet, which is unusual for him, simply smiling and stroking.

“I love you so much,” the older man whispers eventually, and John isn’t sure if Freddie is talking to him or to the baby or to both of them. 

“You’re going to be such a good father, Freddie,” John says gently, overwhelmed by the sentimentality of the moment and by the bloody hormones. 

“You really think so?”

“Absolutely. You’re going to be amazing.”

“ _We’re_  going to be amazing,” Freddie corrects.

He leans in to press his lips against John’s, and they share a tender kiss as they feel their baby kick between them.

*****

Sex is another thing that changes dramatically as John nears the end of his pregnancy.

He’s now so big that there are only a few positions he can stay in comfortably, and only for short periods of time. Which wouldn’t be so bad if he wasn’t so incredibly _horny_ all the time.

He finds himself wandering downstairs completely naked one evening in his final month, desperately searching for his husband, and sighing with relief when he finally sees the older man sitting at the piano.

“Freddie,” John sighs, “I’m _really_ fucking horny. Please step away from the piano and take care of your heavily pregnant husband." 

Freddie turns to face him, and looks as though he’s about to say something, but stops and lets his mouth hang open as he takes in the sight before him. His eyes roam up and down John’s naked body, lingering on John’s erection which is pressed up against his bump, smearing precum over his stomach.

The younger man rubs his belly in agitation.

“Freddie, _please_. I’m really uncomfortable here.”

"Yeah,” Freddie says eventually, swallowing. “Yeah, of course. Christ, John, you have no idea how beautiful you look.”

“I’m as big as a house,” John laughs. “Come on. I need either sex or a cigarette, so you’d better fuck me before I do something I regret.”

Freddie shoots out of his seat at that, and John laughs harder, cupping his belly with both hands for support as he leads the way upstairs. Freddie undresses at the speed of light once they’re in the bedroom, and wastes no time in guiding his pregnant husband to the bed.

The only position in which John can now comfortably have sex is with him lying on his side with Freddie behind him, and it usually takes a bit of manoeuvring for them to get into a position that won’t put too much stress on John’s hips.

John lets out a moan of pleasure as he feels Freddie’s cock push inside him, and reaches behind him to stroke his husband’s face.

“Mm, _fuck_ , Freddie. This is just what I need.” He turns his head to the side so that they can kiss as he feels one of Freddie’s large hands cup his belly. The baby had started moving in response to Freddie’s thrusts, and John feels as though he’s truly at one with his family as he feels them both move inside him. 

“John,” Freddie pants, lifting John’s thigh with his other hand. “John, I fucking love you. I love you both so much.”

“Christ!” John moans as his husband’s hand moves from stroking his belly to pumping his cock. “Oh, _Freddie_!” 

He shudders as he orgasms, and he would’ve been embarrassed at coming so quickly if Freddie hadn’t climaxed thirty seconds later.  

As they collapse against each other, Freddie kisses the back of John’s neck, then his shoulder. 

“You know,” the older man pants, “we won’t be able to be that loud when the baby’s born.”

“You’re the loud one,” John yawns, feeling satisfied and exhausted. The baby seems to have settled down now that they’ve finished, which means it’s a good time for him to fall asleep. Freddie cleans them both up a bit, before pressing one kiss to John’s hair and another to his belly. 

John smiles as he feels Freddie settle behind him, and strong arms wrap around him. He briefly considers making a joke about how hairy Freddie’s arms are, but decides not to ruin the moment and to just close his eyes instead.

*****

A few weeks later, John wakes up in the middle of the night with a sharp pain in his abdomen.

He’s taken back to that night ten years ago when he woke up to find blood on his sheets, and he sits up in terror when he feels that the sheets are damp once again.

He fumbles for the switch to the bedside lamp in a panic with terrifying thoughts running through his head.  _Please_ _no_ _please_ _let_ _the_ _baby_ _be_ _okay_ _please_ _no_ _not_ _again_ _please_ …

“Freddie!” he chokes, as he feels another wave of pain wash over his abdomen. “Fuck, Freddie, wake up!" 

“What?” Freddie scrambles to sit up beside him. “What is it? What’s wrong?" 

"The baby!” John sobs. “The baby, _shit_ , I think I lost it!”

Freddie turns on the bedside lamp, and John feels relief flood his chest when he sees that the sheets aren’t stained crimson. He hasn’t lost the baby.  _He_ _hasn’t_ _lost_ _the_ _baby_.

“Jesus, Fred,” the younger man sniffs, burying his face in Freddie’s t-shirt. “I woke up in pain, and the sheets were damp, and I thought I lost the baby.”

“You didn’t,” Freddie replies softly, stroking the younger man’s face. “Your water just broke, and it sounds as though you’re having contractions. The baby’s on its way.”

 _The_ _baby’s_ _on_ _its_ _way_.

John finds it a little difficult to process that they’d _done_ it, they’d actually made it through the pregnancy. 

Freddie climbs out of bed, and is darting around looking for the bag they’d packed for the hospital, while John sits there stroking his belly. 

 _The_ _baby’s_ _on_ _its_ _way_.

By the time Freddie helps John get dressed, and guides him down to the car, and navigates the streets of London to the hospital, John’s contractions have become more frequent and more painful. He’s almost doubled over as he’s wheeled to their hospital room, and Freddie helps him into the familiar gown.

“I’ve called Brian and Roger,” Freddie babbles, as he settles John on the bed. “And I’ve called your mum. And my parents. And my sister, your sister. I think that’s everyone, right? Everyone I need to contact-”

“Freddie!” John cries as another contraction tears through his body. “Jesus, fuck, this fucking hurts!” He had never experienced such pain in his life; it’s as if the baby is trying to rip out his insides.

He’s in labour for a further twenty-six hours. 

They’re the longest twenty-six hours of his life. Freddie holds his hand, and brings him ice chips, and sits with him patiently while he groans and cries and swears he will never have sex with his husband again. 

“I will cut off your balls, Freddie!” John shouts during one particularly painful contraction. “I will cut off your balls if you ever touch me sexually again!”

Freddie has never looked so frightened, not in the ten years that they’d known each other. He gently presses a kiss to John’s sweat-soaked hair. “I’m here for you, John,” he says softly.

“Oh, _Freddie_ ,” John groans, falling back against the pillow. His eyes are watery but the contractions seem to be taking a break. “I’m so sorry,” he sniffs. “I didn’t mean that. Just hurts so much.”

“I know,” Freddie says sympathetically, stroking his husband’s hair. “I hate seeing you in pain.”

When the time finally comes for John to start pushing, he thinks all his internal organs are going to fall out. Freddie grips his hand tightly, and whispers words of encouragement in his ear as he begins to push. He pushes and he pushes and he _pushes_.

“I can see the head,” Dr. Mortimer says from the bottom of the bed between John’s legs. 

“That’s it? Just the head?” John honestly feels as though he should have pushed the whole damn thing out by now.

“I can’t do this!” he sobs. “Shit, I can’t do this. Freddie,” he turns to look up at his husband with tearful eyes, “I can’t, I’m sorry, I can’t push anymore!”

“Yes you can,” Freddie says determinedly. “You can do this, John.”

John tries to push again, but collapses back against the pillow when he feels as though his arse is being torn in two. “I can’t, I can’t do it. They’ll have to cut it out of me or something.” The tears are now flowing freely down his face.

“We can’t do that, John,” Dr. Mortimer says firmly. “You’re too far along. Come on now, you can do this.”

“You’re so close,” Freddie whispers. “So close, John. Think of our baby. Think of how soon you’ll be able to hold our baby in your arms. You can do this. I’ve seen you do incredible things and I _know_ you can do this.”

Squeezing Freddie’s hand so hard that he’s sure some bones must break, John sits up and pushes with a scream. 

 _You_ _can_ _do_ _this_. 

Push. 

 _You_   _can_   _do_ _this_. 

Push. 

 _You_   _can_   _do_ _this_. 

Push.

With a final shout, John falls back against the pillow as he hears his child’s cries fill the air for the first time. 

 _He’s_ _done_ _it._

"Oh, _John_ ,” Freddie says, his voice thick with emotion and his own eyes filling with tears. “You were amazing, my love. Absolutely amazing.”

John is still a little in shock and has barely any time to take it all in before a nurse is pressing a bundle of blankets into his arms. 

“Congratulations to you both,” she says with a smile. “It’s a boy.”

“ _Oh_ ,” is all John is able to say as he runs a trembling finger over his son’s tiny face.

He’s beautiful. It’s hard to believe that this is the tiny being that has been living inside John for the last nine months.

“He has your eyes, Fred,” John says in a hoarse voice, noting that the baby’s eyes are a warm brown. 

“Mm,” Freddie says happily, sitting beside John on the bed and wrapping an arm around him. “I can already tell he’s going to have your smile though.”

They spend a few minutes in silence with their newborn son while the nurse cleans away the bloody sheets. John forgets about the numbing pain in his nether regions as he feels himself become completely consumed by love for his baby. The baby that is safe and healthy and so  _alive_.

“Sorry to interrupt the happy moment,” Dr. Mortimer says gently, “but we need to stitch John up. He’s suffered some severe tearing and he’s still bleeding a bit. It’s nothing to worry about; it’s quite common and won’t take long at all. Freddie, why don’t you take the baby?”

John carefully hands the baby to Freddie, who gently cradles his son, rocking him from side to side. His heart flutters at the sight of his husband and son together, and he quickly decides that all the pain was definitely worth it.

*****

They allow Brian and Roger into the room once John has been cleaned up.

“You look tired,” Roger jokes, kissing John’s sweaty cheek. “But look at him. What a cutie.”

“Congratulations,” Brian grins, clapping Freddie on the shoulder. “Are you gonna tell us the name of James’ new best friend? Or are we gonna keep calling him Baby Mercury?”

Freddie and John share a smile.

“His name,” Freddie says proudly, “is Daniel Alexander Mercury.”

“ _Daniel_ ,” Roger coos. “That’s a lovely name.”

John lets them both hold his son and takes the opportunity to rest his eyes for a moment. He listens to his husband and friends chatter in the background, and the exhaustion finally hits him. Before he realises it, he finds himself drifting off to sleep.

The next thing he knows, he wakes up to find Brian and Roger gone, and Freddie sitting in a chair by his bed, rocking Daniel gently in his arms.

“You’re awake,” Freddie says softly.

“Mm.” John opens his arms with a sleepy smile, gesturing for his husband to hand him the baby.

John is exhausted. But it doesn’t matter how tired he is; he never wants to stop holding his baby boy. He stares at Daniel in his lap, marveling at how gorgeous he is. They’d done it. They have a healthy little boy.

Freddie wraps one arm around John and uses his other hand to stroke his son’s face. “I didn’t think I’d ever love anyone as much as I love you,” he says quietly, “but I think you’ve got some competition now.”

John sighs happily and leans into Freddie’s touch, allowing himself to become engulfed by the warmth of his family. He finally has his baby, _their_  baby in his arms. There’s nothing he has to worry about anymore.

Well, except for bringing the baby up, of course.

But that’s something he’ll worry about tomorrow.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has been reading and leaving such lovely comments. As always, the amazing love and support is what keeps me going!
> 
> This chapter serves as the epilogue for the story- hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> Tumblr @bohemian-rhapsody-slash

_Five_ _years_ _later_

 

John smiles as he balances a Tupperware container of grapes on his belly, picking one out to hand to his youngest son. 

“Eat up, Charlie,” he says encouragingly, grinning when the toddler takes hold of the grape from him. “Fruit will make you big and strong.”

Charlie pops the grape into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully before patting John’s bump gratefully with a tiny hand. John laughs and wraps an arm around his son, pulling him close.

He looks over to the other side of the studio, where Freddie is sat at the keyboard with Daniel on his lap, teaching their oldest son a simple melody. Daniel sticks out his tongue as he copies his father’s movements on the keys, smiling as he manages to play the tune perfectly. John can’t quite believe how grown up his boy looks already; he has Freddie’s warm brown eyes, although Freddie always insists he has John’s smile.

“That’s it, Danny,” Freddie praises. “Well done. Maybe you could play on the next album!”

Daniel looks pleased and shoots a toothy grin at John. “Did you hear that Daddy? Did you see me play?”

“I heard you,” John smiles warmly, stroking Charlie’s hair with one hand and his bump with the other. “You’re very good, sweetheart. Soon you’ll be better than Papa.”

Daniel giggles delightedly, but suddenly his attention is distracted by movement at the studio door.

A young boy with curly dark hair and blue eyes sprints in, followed by Brian and Roger, who are both looking a little breathless. Roger in particular looks as though he’s about to pass out, blond hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, as he’s shifts their daughter who he’s carrying on his hip.

“James!” Brian scolds breathlessly. “What have I told you about running off like that?”

James ignores his father though in favour of rushing over to Daniel excitedly. John’s heart melts when the two giggling boys pull each other into a hug, and Daniel gives James a sloppy kiss on the cheek. The younger boy’s attention soon turns to Brian and Roger though, who are catching their breath as they dump various bags of toys and nappies in the corner.

“Uncle Brian! Uncle Roger! Papa taught me a song on the piano!”

Brian chuckles and ruffles Daniel’s hair, picking him up and carrying him over to Freddie at the keyboard. James bounces over to listen as Daniel sticks out his tongue in concentration and starts playing the tune Freddie taught him.

“Hello you,” Roger says to John with a smile, lifting the little girl on his hip onto the sofa next to Charlie.

“Hello you,” John parrots, exchanging kisses with the blond.

“Look how big you’ve got.” Roger’s eyes sweep over John’s bump. “You’re looking very pregnant, sir.”

“I _feel_ very pregnant,” John sighs. “I’m ridiculously uncomfortable.”

“You poor thing,” Roger says softly, reaching for one of John’s grapes to feed to his daughter. “You still ok to watch this lot today while we finish off some recording? I think Emily’s probably just going to fall asleep.”

“Yes that’s fine,” John laughs. “James and Daniel will probably just want to play with each other and I’ll read a story or something for the little ones.” He strokes Charlie’s hair, who is now happily munching on grapes with Emily.

John had given up playing bass throughout his pregnancy, but had encouraged the rest of the band to continue with production of _A_ _Kind_ _of_ _Magic_. They’d insisted that he still be present for all their studio sessions, and while most of their work during the last few months had mainly been writing and editing, there had been a few jam sessions and a bit of recording which John hadn’t taken part in. But he’d been more than happy to volunteer to watch the children while the boys played.

As John had got bigger, Freddie had started making sure there was always a comfy nest in the corner of the studio for his pregnant husband. John is quite content to curl up on the sofa under some blankets and watch Freddie belt out lyrics as the children cuddle up to him.

“It’ll be nice to have you back recording with us,” Roger comments. “It’s not the same without you.”

“I’m looking forward to coming back too. I miss playing bass. But for now I’m happy to play babysitter.”

“And we’re very grateful,” Brian adds, coming over to give John a kiss on the cheek. “Maybe once you’ve had this one, Freddie can knock you up again so you can be our babysitter a little while longer.”

John’s eyes meet Freddie’s and he grins, blushing. When Daniel had been born, they’d immediately agreed that it would be nice for him to have a sibling, and two years later Charlie came along. Seeing their two children together made John yearn for more, and before he knew it he was pregnant with their third. And from the way Freddie’s eyes light up whenever he feels the baby kick or sees John step out of the shower cupping his bump, he suspects it might not be their last.

“Come on, darlings,” Freddie interrupts. “Let’s get this over with so we can get out of this god-awful studio and take the kids to the park.”

As Brian, Roger and Freddie make their way into the booth, John hunts around for a story book in the pile of toys beside him on the sofa. He smiles when he sees James and Daniel setting up a plastic tea set on the floor and lining up their teddy bears for a pretend tea party.

Opening up the book and sliding closer to Charlie and Emily, John catches Freddie’s eye from behind the glass and smiles. He can see the warmth in his husband’s eyes as the older man takes in the sight of John with the children.

John strokes a hand over his bump, sighing happily when he feels a kick.

They’ve come a long way since that devastating night fifteen years ago, and although they’ve been through so much to get here, John wouldn’t have had it any other way.

They finally have their perfect family.


End file.
